Remembering My Mom: Elaine A. DelMonico

Elaine A. DelMonico (1941-2019)

Obituary

“On the Feast of St. Francis of Assisi, October 4, 2019, with him and St. Jude the Apostle to guide her, Elaine Ann DelMonico was embraced by the loving arms of God and ushered into her heavenly home, surrounded and supported by her loving son, sister, niece and nephew. The time of life which St. Francis sang of as “Sister Death” came peacefully for her, at St. Elizabeth Medical Center, after a long struggle with COPD.

Elaine’s Roman Catholic faith was the foundation of her life, instilled by her parents. She was baptized at St. Mary of Mt. Carmel Parish, participating in the other sacraments and in the life of Blessed Sacrament Parish as an adult. She continued to be an active parishioner when the communities merged in 2006 to become St. Mary of Mt. Carmel/Blessed Sacrament. The music ministry of the choir, in which her son participates, especially inspired her faith, as did the relationships she shared with friends in the parish. She would come to the choral meditation evenings at the parish whenever she had the chance. In her personal prayer life, she maintained long-time devotions to the Infant Jesus of Prague, to our Blessed Mother Mary, and especially to St. Jude, the Catholic patron for those who have lost hope. Ever hopeful herself, she always prayed for her needs and those of others, confident in God’s loving and tender care – a confidence which she maintained even as her health failed over the past year. Deeply independent, with an amazing strength of will and conviction, Elaine also attentively cared for her family, her home and the well-being of others, often above her own needs. So deep was that care, she sometimes struggled to accept when others worked to care for her. She persevered with a zest for living all the way through her last days in this life.”

– Excerpts from Elaine’s obituary
The Observer-Dispatch, Utica, NY
October 7, 2019

Video Remembrance

I graciously acknowledge the work of Matt Funeral Home, Inc.in the production of this memorial video features photos of mom and family from throughout her life.

Vigil Service: October 8, 2019 (Utica, New York)

On October 8, 2019, my family and friends of my mom and the parish choir of St. Mary of Mt. Carmel / Blessed Sacrament Church, Utica, New York, gathered at Matt Funeral Home in Utica to honor my mom with a beautiful and intimate wake service. Sr. Elizabeth Giarrusso, CSJ, led the service and offered reflections on Elaine’s life and the way in which she touched the lives of so many around her. I gracious acknowledge Sr. Elizabeth and the support and collaboration of Peter Elacqua, Director of Music Ministry at St. Mary of Mt. Carmel / Blessed Sacrament Church for his assistance in the preparation and implementation of this program.

Mass of Christian Burial & Homily: October 9, 2019 (Utica, New York)

The funeral liturgy for my mom was celebrated at St. Mary of Mt. Carmel / Blessed Sacrament Church in Utica, New York on October 9, 2019. Many of the songs were chosen by mom in advance, with additional songs and musical settings of the Scriptures chosen to complement her selections. Also included in the program are reflective meditations about the songs, readings and rites. The music ministry was provided by the St. Mary of Mt. Carmel / Blessed Sacrament parish choir. I gracious acknowledge the support and collaboration of Peter Elacqua, Director of Music Ministry at St. Mary of Mt. Carmel / Blessed Sacrament Church, and Anne Elacqua, pastoral associate, for their assistance in the preparation and implementation of this program.

The liturgy included several priests who ministered at the parishes where my mom celebrated the sacraments and others personally known to her and me. My friend from college, Fr. Scott VanDerveer from the Diocese of Albany, NY preached a beautiful funeral homily reflecting on the assurance of faith, the example of faith, gratitude and dignity in my mom’s life, and all the ways that she touched the lives of family and friends.

Memorial Word Service: November 8, 2019 (Washington, D.C.)

One month after my mom’s funeral liturgy, friends and colleagues at the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, where I serve as Director of Certification for Ecclesial Ministry and Service. area gathered in the chapel in our building for a brief memorial service and reception to commemorate my mom’s life. The songs and readings for the service were based on the Vigil Service celebrated in Utica. I extend my gratitude to Mr. Scot Hawkins of Silver Spring, Md. for offering music ministry with me and to the General Services and my office staff for their help in preparing the event.

Memorial Liturgy & Homily: November 9, 2019 (Silver Spring, Md.)

One month after my mom’s funeral liturgy, friends and colleagues of mine in the Washington, D.C. area gathered in the daily Mass chapel of St. Camillus Parish in Silver Spring, Md. to celebrate my mom’s entrance into new life. Many of the songs from the funeral chosen by mom in advance were retained, with additional songs and musical settings of the Scriptures chosen to complement her selections. Also included in the program are reflective meditations about the songs, readings and rites. Music ministry was provided by the St. Camillus Intercultural Choir. 

The liturgy included two priests who were colleagues from my time of graduate studies in theology. The homily was offered by Fr. Joseph Wimmer, OSA, reflecting on the Christian mystery of death and new life in Christ. A download of his homily text is available below.